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Opinion of norwegian men

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Skjult ID med pseudonym Amour. lø. 10 jan. 02:34

I would like to know the opinion of norwegian men from age 30 to 45 (or 50) about women of "darker color", foreigners women or women from another culture, as you wish to call them.
I am a serious woman, well educated, intelligent and pretty from inside out. I made sure that my pictures and what i wrote in my profile don't give wrong signal or imaginations... So i don't understand how men will dare to offer me a "friends with benefits" or "not something serious" type of relationship.
Since this has happened many times on the net as well as on the real live in my interactions with men, i wonder if there's something wrong with me or it's true that norwegian men first see foreigners as women to play with while waiting for their ideal woman?
I wonder if there's something wrong with me because since i attract men who view me as "sexual friend" instead of the loved and respected girlfriend that i wish to be, the problem must lie in me and i wish to find it so that i could change it.
But to my surprise, while speaking to women with my background, i found out that we face the same issue. Mostly.
So my question is: "What is the view of norwegian men (age 30 to 45) about women of darker color? Do you first see us as girlfriend material or "knu..ekompiser"

I am genuinely interested in understanding the norwegian culture and i would like to know if i should give up dating norwegian men as i don't want to expose myself in "fated" disappointment by meeting dead end in relationship due to the fact the i am from another culture or race.
One can change a belief, an attitude, learn a new language, a new way of behaving but one can never change its origin. And if that's something that would be my "bad luck" in dating, i rather give up now. The heart is the source of my being and i don't want to expose it to unnecessary harm.

I hope you will be able to see the honesty in this post and you would be able to answer back in an intelligent and respectful way.
Thanks in advance. :-)

Skjult ID med pseudonym - lø. 10 jan. 03:13

hey amour ! I have no problem seeing that what you describe is likely a correct description of many Norwegian men ... perhaps especially in a place like this ( sukker ) . But I do not think that your description will apply to Norwegian men in general. You, like Norwegian girls, will experience harassment when it comes to online dating , just that the harassment you experience will be more directed towards what these Neanderthals see and think when they look at your profile...because you look different . On behalf of all "normal" Norwegian men between the age of 30 to 50, or whatever it was , I apologize for this.

Skjult ID med pseudonym - lø. 10 jan. 04:03

wow ... amour , really ... it was nothing. I think a good advice would be not to put too much in to this online dating stuff , people will always hurt each other ... go figure ... not take it personally , idiots are everywhere , even in Norway ! I wish you all the best in this harsh jungle called online dating, miss Amour:)

Skjult ID med pseudonym _________ lø. 10 jan. 04:16

I'm not of the appropriate age, but I will chip in regardless.

As far as I'm aware, Norwegian men (or any other group, for that matter), generally prefer to date within their own ethnicity. I'm sure some of them would only consider Nordic women for serious relationships, and I'm sure others don't care about colour. Personally I don't care much, but ideally, I'm hoping to find a tan woman (Southern Europe, Middle-East, etc.).

Also, a lot of people will blatantly ignore anything you write on your profile, so even if you write that you aren't looking for friends with benefits, many men will contact you hoping to become exactly that.

The assholes are always easier to notice. Keep at it, and I'm sure you'll find yourself a kind, loving and tolerant man, whether he's Norwegian or not.

Skjult ID med pseudonym - lø. 10 jan. 05:37

"will always be sometimes"...what does that actually mean?

Skjult ID med pseudonym _________ lø. 10 jan. 09:58

^
"Alltid noen ganger"

Spesielt mye mening, gir det dog ikke.

(mann 34 år fra Oslo) lø. 10 jan. 13:53 Privat melding

May or may not be directly applicable due to cultural differences, but it's still kind of interesting:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HjSh_esW9W4

As for the original question here, I was ironically on the other side of this with a "woman of darker color" - she was just looking for something non-committal ;). Fair enough and no harm, no foul.

Skjult ID med pseudonym Creeper lø. 10 jan. 14:11

http://qz.com/149342/the-uncomfortable-racial-preferences-revealed-by-online-dating/

(mann 41 år fra Akershus) lø. 10 jan. 15:50 Privat melding

My impression is that your experiences are quite common for women on the online dating scene independent of ... well almost everything except having two X-chromosomes.

Since the "not serious" guys are free to pour out messages at whatever frequency they can manage, they will easily seem like the majority, while in reality that may be far from the case as many "serious" guys send out far fewer messages each.

(kvinne 40 år fra Oslo) lø. 10 jan. 21:10 Privat melding

Thank you to you all for your replies! They were all very helpful and enlightening.

With appreciation,
Amour :-)

Skjult ID med pseudonym klodrik sø. 11 jan. 02:49

Heureuse, m'as bloqué ... but that's not the point here. The way sukker is built, you only see a small percentage of potential matches, because the rest is hidden from you. Possibly there are people looking for someone just like you, but they will never see you (or you will be on page 8 with match 78, practically invisible).

Personally I'm quite interested in women from other parts of the world. It's a pity there is no way to search for them based on ethnicity or origin or whatever. I would love to have that functionality available. There are other (international) services that cater for that need, and they tend to have a fair amount of Norwegian men too.

As for the direct offers you're receiving - they should be viewed as spam and ignored. I am sure there are hot shots who think more is better.

Skjult ID med pseudonym metoo sø. 11 jan. 11:49

I think this applies to Norwegian women as well. Men might look for love, but if they can't picture that with you as you go out on a date, they will often try to get something else out of it….

(mann 39 år fra Oslo) sø. 11 jan. 15:29 Privat melding

6 of my 7 last girlfriends have been from a country that is not nordic, so it depends on the man i would say. (Way back from 2004 and up to now)

(mann 51 år fra Vestfold) sø. 11 jan. 18:09 Privat melding

Norwegian men (and woman) have never been good in intermediate talk, normal friendly flirt and conversation. We tend to eighter keep quiet and present us selves as shy or we try to impress with rather promiscuous compliments. When you have established confident and trust over time you will discover more personal and closely related communication with nordic people. Give it a try.

(kvinne 40 år fra Oslo) sø. 11 jan. 21:31 Privat melding

Thank you to you all ! I find your replies very friendly and encouraging which is great as i felt vulnerable to share that issue here. But your replies, in addition that they are helpful and deeper my understanding, they show me that there are still good norwegian men out there who understand that behind the women of color there's simply a woman with a heart.

Hugs,
Amour :-)